I got the Poison :I got the remedy!

Where to start..........

Last story before the big chop was from the hospital, so I ll go back to there, Keith came to visit Sunday morning, more blood tests antibiotic drip etc, same old routine, then wait for the Doctors ward round, he appeared and I thought, here comes more bad news.... but ....you neutrophils are up again, not as much as we hoped, but in the right direction , you obviously would be happier at home, with more sleep etc etc so you can go home with oral antibiotics and if you come back for blood test in the morning, but any sign of high temp etc then come back, YES, brilliant, of course, I ve done my homework I  replied! He laughed and said I can tell!

So we packed up all the stuff, and there was a lot to pack! Two trips to the car and off we went, home for supernoodles! Thanks again and Andrea, so soft and didn’t hurt at all, mouth is improving now though so back to nice healthily dinners apart from last night as we didn’t eat till 9 after the hair excitement !

So I came home, Lottie was at grandmas so said let her stay ther you go two Keith eat properly, both of you ,t hen bring her back and I will compose myself for when you return, I can see my Mum and sister that way too, was desperate to see them both.

When they arrived home she was so pleased to see me, just held her for ages, massive cuggles! ( Lottie can’t say cuddle!) we cuddled on the chair and waited for Tracy to come over, couldn’t wait to see her, We were planning to catch up at hospital, but this was better, she could come to my house! It  was great to see her, had a fun afternoon with Lottie , watching film in bed chatting and catching up on everything, Tracy is going to pretend that I m on a round the world trip when she is work! Loved that, I am on an adventure just a very different one, different to anything I ever thought I would cope with or do.

I asked Lottie if she loved me she said, No,  little madam! Love daddy? I asked,? No she replied!  nannie? Granga? NO she replied, I LOVE MANDY , I asked her why, mmmm maybe because I love my Mandy,. How sweet is that! Maybe she has been brainwashed in my absence! But she always has loved Mandy, she is very special after all . I must make an effort to become no.1 again lol

Mum Dad and Mandy came over Sunday night, just like normal kind of evening, was all laughing at Lottie she was being a real show off, excited we were all together again! They left and Keith put Lottie to bed, along came the sleeping marathon, should have got that sponsored for my charity stuff! 8pm till 5.30 am the next day , longest ever for me lately, Keith woke me at 10pm for my tablets, threw them down my thought, thought he was a nurse for a bit, and I was still in hospital, it was really odd feeling, but brilliant when I realised I was home.

Monday 28^th Feb

Loads to do, need a new wig, hair falling out, called Bex, need to the help and support, going to town to check out the shop Nat found out about for me! Thanks Nat

Went for blood test with Mum, had test not too much of a wait went to shop when waited for Keith, bought mum and Mandy a present hope they like them, only little but would buy them the world if I could after that the last two weeks, and a few other people too, too many to mention I would have to win the euro millions! Can’t believe how amazing people have been!

Saw Auntie in the shop next door, was amazing to see her, huge cuddles all round.

I put on my brave face and went in, so much in there, had a look around. We explained the situation and what we had in mind, She couldn’t have been more helpful, trying things on, what to use, how to clean it, etc etc, found the perfect one, same colour as mine almost exactly!

We laughed so much, is it right to be laughing when you are going completely bald? We just were so excited this shop was so close to us, and we didn’t know it was there!

AFRO ELEGANCE, HAIR AND BEAUTY STORE www.afroelegance.com 7 the Arcade Letchworth 01462 676140, its not open every day so check before you make a trip but well worth the trip, lots of hair pieces etc too to add to your hair, amazing, should have had some before now!

I will def be going back, maybe today to see if there are any others I want, there was a fab wavy one, reasonable prices too, could be like my new handbag addiction, a wig for every outfit ! lol Keith will be pleased! I ll get a new one for Lottie’s birthday party, need to get on send out invites, already spoke to some of you, its going to be amazing! Want to make it a birthday to remember for us all! So will need a new wig for that! Cheaper than a hair cut as my auntie pointed out! x

Names the new wig, Posh, all wigs going to be after celebs, so Posh can keep Cheryl company! 

Came home excited but could see may hair pouring out, thanks Bex for trying to cover it up but by the evening no one could hide that with a flowers/hairbands etc!

Went back to hospital for results, lots to tell, Lottie was amazing good girl, so proud of her. He was brilliant, neutrophil up to 1, would like it above 1.5 but we have till wed to get it up and its gone up every day, no temp, no illness, brilliant!

The xray result was there.... deep breath... Lenny had shrunk already! Wanted to scream and dance! I Haven’t seen Keith that happy for weeks! The best news ever, we didn’t think we would get any indication of that till after the chemo, couldn’t be happier, do one Lenny, your time is up! We don’t want/need you, never did, bye bye! Round one to me! Bring on the next chemo, all seems worth it now !

Also there is a drug I can take next time to boost my WBC (white blood count) and neutrophils so this may mean I don’t go neutropenic again and would avoid the hospital stay! They cant do it on your first cycle but can do it next time, it involves injection after chemo but they can come to my house and do that for me every day next week following chemo. More good news

Its called GCSF, it stimulates the bone marrow, and boost WBC and neutrophils, amazing, becoming a lymphoma guru! (loved that one Sally)

The Doctor used those magical words again, very treatable and responding well! Its reduced in size already!

Saw Lynne, who said I looked amazing, thanks sweetie, really needed to hear that, Hair was really worrying me x

Back to lister first thing Wed 2^nd March for blood test to see where we are before chemo Thursday!

Went to the car with a huge smile, had a text from Dan to say meeting had finished and to hurry up and  offered me tea! Blimey must have Cancer, he never makes a brew! Lol

So today is my day off! No bloods only tablets !  

Went to work, so amazing to see them all logged on like normal day! Laughed with Tracy and Keith, my work mum arrived for a cuddle and the girls, told Tracy no fuss, and she kept it normal for me, NO TEARS just happy smiles please, I m not dying, I just got a few things to fix and I ll be back!

Had a chat with everyone, Dan made me a drink, warm milk, hilarious really as I usually have black coffee ! Dan even made a few more drinks! Wow! Work drinks to wish the lovely Gillian good luck as she is leaving, hoping to make that one on the 10^th if I have my injections I may not go neutropenic! Keep your fingers crossed for me!

So thats work sorted will tick it off the list! Got a lift home with Tracy like old times, Lottie loves her car, beige beatle, love that car!  Went in to my baby girl, waved Tracy off! Lottie blowing kisses! How cute.

Hair was looking ropey, called Mand on Skype, needs to come off, we agreed, and honestly is one of my rules for this rollercoaster trip. She came over, Keith got out the clippers, felt sick, Decided to let Lottie watch, less of  shock, she can help, she laughing, we all were, Had to take the scissors to it first, see what it will be like when grows back int he summer, not bad, thought would hate it!

Number 8 first! You could see the baldness and patches! Number 6 next, hair everywhere, Good job Keith cuts his own hair! He nearly expert been doing it for more than ten years, he was brave to do mine though, Love him.  Went on till we cut it to 0.5! had a bath and mum arrived, she was great, no tears, we laughed a the relief my head wasn’t a funny shape!

Skped the family and friends, really laughing, put the wig on then pulled it for the big reveal! My fav reaction was cous Col, WOW! Looked like he went back a metre! He liked my head shape too! Aunite loved it too!  Cous Emma and K looked shocked but pleased! Rocking the bald look! Lol then Damian and Lisa, Das aid we could be the new Mitchell brothers, he has a 0.5 too! Bex and family loved it too! Felt good about it which surprised me ! Showed my Daddy, burst out laughing, we both did! Hilarious, should i be laughing! Keep saying that but I found it funny!

Put some pics on facebook, get shock value out of the way! Can’t wait to go out with my Carla today, first outing, need a serious dose of confidence boosting, I ll have to have wetabix! But seriously I got to do this, first outing, then it’ll get easier, wish me luck for today

Oh, my fab news, venue for charity event confirmed, lots more too, Toms fund raising at £400 today running half marathon for chemo unit, please support it, they save lives there, nothing more precious than that

http://www.justgiving.com/Thoams-Barnett

that’s my rather long blog, just one more link theme tune of today

I got the poison, I got the poison
I got the poison, I got the poison

I got the poison, I got the remedy
I got the pulsating rhythmical remedy
I got the poison, I got the remedy
I got the pulsating rhythmical remedy
I got the poison, I got the remedy
I got the pulsating rhythmical remedy
I got the poison, I got the remedy
I got the pressure, the pressure

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j1D2wnm5zPk

Have a good day everyone x

INVINCIBLE

Baldie! its only hair it will grow back,  things could be worse!  keep smiling

really tired so quick post, had a fab and long day, new hair , new wig, new shaved head to finish the day, all came out in clumps so time for Mr M to shave it off, laughed all the way, more pics to follow and an update with all my news from the last couple of days , best news is £378 for Toms run and the chemo ward at UCL , well done Tom, you a superstar, more fundraising to follow soon! should I be this ok about having Cancer, going to stay positive

today's theme tune http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M7TfkJdfqzo INVINCIBLE! thanks gregs x

first fundraiser, for the chemo unit UCL

 AMAZING NEWS! sponsors needed for the first phase of the Lyddon Merryweather fundraising team!

The first fund raising commences,just two weeks after I was diagnosed with Lymphoma,
this means so much to me, I cant describe how much and don't want to go all weepy so will stop there!

A kind chap called Tom, who will be running the Eastborne half marathon on the 6th March to raise money in my honour for the chemo unit at UCL which treats Lymphoma and will be treating me for me  Chemo over the next 12 weeks, I return there next week on the 3rd March.

Its totally brilliant and kind, thank you Tom, please log on and sponsor him, it only needs to be what you can afford, the target is £500, please help support the fantastic team and work they do there!and show Tom how much we appreciate the support he is showing

Good Luck Tom !

http://www.justgiving.com/Thoams-Barnett

The FEAR good fear, FOR EVERYTHING A REASON!

Sunday27.02.2011 6.15am, captains log. Hours of isolation driving me crazy, may have to cause a scene like Hilda today just for the fun of it! Its bit like prison, keep my things tidy can’t control what I eat or drink, but it’s all for my own benefit and I don’t want to complain only look forward to getting home to my little Merryweather, wonder how she is this morning.

Good news story today, time to celebrate a whole night’s sleep, only just woken up, I consider that a victory, stick that Lenny, i m sleeping again!  And through shouting coughing and general loud odd noises from the ward outside! Think the chemo side effect of being seriously tired is kicking in, yesterday was thinking what can I do when I get home, now thinking I just want my bed and to sleep ready for Round two of the big fight next week! Need to rest those little neutrophils!

One job is high on my list, MY HAIR, its coming out, like when you wash it and some falls out, but this time more than you would like to see on your pillow or in your sink, so time to shave it when I get home maybe, or hang onto it for a big longer and style is out with a few headbands! Good job I have a lot of hair to come out!

Really need to get another wig before any clippers are taken out of their box ! Keith can shave it, does his own hair all the time, he’s a professional as Nan says ! Off to the shop when get home then bed, it’s a deal! Oh and a new case for hospital, can’t borrow Mandy’s forever and seen a fab one with camper vans on it! Oh and some new music for my ipod and then maybe I will rest

Keep thinking about our holiday booked for July, found some picutres from last year on mums laptop! Hope its as nice as last year , we can make it extra special this year and I ll have a new collection of hats for the beach!

Theme tune is set for the day Ian Brown THE FEAR – this is my phones ringtone ! amazing song! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f9wue5sCpuM

Ian Brown - F.E.A.R.

F.E.A.R.

For each a road
For everyman a religion
Find everybody and rule
For everything and rumble
Forget everything and remember
For everything a reason
Forgive everybody and remember

For each a road
For everyman a religion
Face everybody and rule
For everything and rumble
Forget everything and remember
For everything a reason

You got the fear
You got the fear
You got the fear
You got the fear
You got the fear
F.E.A.R. (You got the fear)
F.E.A.R. (You got the fear)
F.E.A.R. (You got the fear)
F.E.A.R. (You got the fear)

Final eternity arouses reactions
Freeing excellence affects reality
Fallen empires are ruling
Find earth and reef

Fantastic expectations
Amazing revelations
Final execution and resurrection
Free expression as revolution
Finding everything and realizing

You got the fear
You got the fear
You got the fear
You got the fear
You got the fear
F.E.A.R. (You got the fear)
F.E.A.R. (You got the fear)
F.E.A.R. (You got the fear)
F.E.A.R. (You got the fear)

(Fantastic expectations
Amazing revelations
Finding everything and realizing
For everything a reason)

F.E.A.R. (You got the fear)
F.E.A.R. (You got the fear)
F.E.A.R. (You got the fear)
F.E.A.R. (You got the fear)
You got the fear
You got the fear
You got the fear
You got the fear

PERFECT!

FOR EVERYTHING A REASON, FANTASTIC EXPECTATIONS
AMAZING REVELATIONS

I can listen to more calm songs today must be feeling more calm, slow/sad songs were not helping another triumph today, stick that Lenny, 2:0 to me!

Keith coming this morning and Tracey this afternoon and then Mandy and Mum, and then maybe just maybe home, or maybe one more night! At hotel Lister, got a list of questions when that doctor comes round! They must hate coming into my room!

More info before Chemo next week for my fund raising, few more jobs to do but then the just giving pages will be set up, need to speak to my committee first about setting targets etc watch this space!

Lennys letter! and new blog design launch!

Saturday, been a good day, saw mum and dad, miss my mummy and daddy can’t wait to be home and be able to see them whenever I want!

Nan came to visit today and the Lovely Mr and Mrs Ellis

Lenny had his first card today, 56 cards in total now and I m claiming Lennys as mine seeing as he is squatting in my chest!

Card reads as follows

“Lenny, By the powers vested in us we hereby serve you a four month eviction notice, Please vacate the premises within this time frame or further action will be taken. You have over stayed your welcome, not that you were ever welcome.

The Tuminator as you already are aware is a major fighter, You have already lost , Just give up now. Cease and desist orders issued by the teamlyddonmerryweather supporters

Mr and Mrs Ellis”

Really made me laugh, thanks guys, always so good to me, the ice lolly was a treat too, really nice on my sore throat!.

Mr McCalla arrived, they gloved him up and an apron, must have thought u were germ ridden H, no one else had to! H was shortly followed by the lovely Miss Penman, with lovely milky drink treats too! And a promise of a shopping trip, cant wait to have a  girls fun day Penners!

A promise of some music arrived by text from Mr G, but the list was shocking, a real mixed bag, makes mine look good! Lol only Kieron liked it but he is in the same gang (40 age bracket!) and it pains them both to admit it!

I decided that everyone visiting needed to draw a picture on my board

Votes later for the winner? I ll try do a vote on the page tomorrow!

Secured a venue for the big charity bash, so excited rang Emma and Mandy to tell them! Bit too excited so had to tell them I would call them back, so many ideas, need to have a meeting with Mrs Lane  when I return home with us and the fund raising committee!

Really likes Claire’s idea last night, a pirate night out, then we can all wear a scarf/hat out and I wont look the odd one out!  Brilliant idea, maybe we can turn it into a charity event!

Keith coming tomorrow, can’t wait to see him again, Lottie been a good girl today, had lots of fun with Auntie Mandy and Nannie, still has a black eye, glad I m not there to look like I did that to her!  Miss her more than I can say, wont dwell on that as I will only cry

No news on my neutrophil count, maybe tomorrow Doctor said could be a day or so more, need to get home, I m too busy for neutropenic arrangements!

Mandy and Tracey came tonight, cheered me up,  had a laugh at Mandy’s expense, apparently she fell over on the mud outside and nearly did herself an injury, maybe she could have ended up next door, on my ward! Could have had some fun on a Saturday night in ssu!

I must say how lovely the staff are here, they really are, they deserve more recognition for the work they do, I couldn’t do these 12 hour shifts and listen to the upset and distress that I m trying to pretend I can’t hear!

Big news story is the new blog design, thank you Jo, a real superstar, can’t wait to look at it a bit more in to it when I have some more time, so much we can do, especially now I have my own designer! The page is so more like my style, bright breezy and happy, thank you again Jo, a real star as always

Anyway need to sleep, need to look my best for My Mr Merryweather tomorrow x

todays catch phrase! If its not positive I m Not Involved!!

Saturday day 4 trapped again in isolation for my own benefit I know, trying to think of it as a bonus, own room, a VIP, special treatment, but what I wouldn’t give to get up and walk about , getting cabin fever in here. Time for the ipod therapy, Music makes me feel better, need to update this ipod when I get home, tunes getting boring, I ve put them on shuffle for a variety! Lucky dip time!  Theme tune today is back to my hospital one, you don’t wanna spend the night round here, listened to this over and over last week! Imagining myself fighting and in a pimp wagon shooting Lenny!

 http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GLfEU5lelUM

I see no point in living life that right, so I just take what I can find.
I see no point in living life that right, when your out here in this jungle.
It's wild round 'ere, you don't wanna spend a night round 'ere.
When your out here in this jungle, aint nothing nice round 'ere, troubles what you find round 'ere.
When your out here in this jungle, in this jungle.
Your always caught in this struggle, in this jungle .
But you keep asking for trouble, you love? You love when trouble comes your way, your way, your way.Fell asleep really early, sorry if missed any messages, calls and cous Emma, see you today hopefully, missed your text as was asleep by 9.30 ish hence why I m awake now a t 4am!  Can’t wait to get back to my super king size bed!  This small single just isn’t cutting it! And to do my nails, and make makeup and clothes, hate pjs, , look good, fell better I say!  Cant wait to be home and have a bath, no shower here and not allowed out of the room, just a wash! Lovely! Just like a prison cell hey! They probably have a better room than me, this is the doghouse, was like a penthouse in London!

 I need to stay germ free! My neutrophils are low and they are your foot soldiers for your immune system, they return to a normal level by themselves, so get a move on! There isn’t anything I can do to give them a boost but wait! Maybe I need a neutrophil coach to get them in shape! Like Mr Motivator! Hence why I wasn’t allowed home, couldn’t blog or talk last night much as was a misery, sorry for taking it out on you mum, you know I don’t meant it, Love you always

http://www.wisegeek.com/what-are-neutrophils.htm

Mandy and Claire tried to cheer me up, googled hair ideas/ bald cover ups! bandanas/scarves, ways to tie scarves etc ready for the ‘fall out’ hair is thinning, hat is at the ready to come home in but lucky I have thick hair to start so maybe it will hang about for a bit longer, just listening to  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o5mKAgb5px0  ironic again! Is someone trying to upset!whip my hair! boody shuffle setting! Well you wont upset me,  I m fighting again today, you won last night but \I m back up and ready for you Lenny, the Bailiffs are coming, pack your bag you beast! You need to leave ( thanks Andrea love that one!!)

need to go shopping, new scarves hats accessories needed! That’s a bonus right, a new wardrobe of accessories, will have to go home sell a shed load of stuff on eBay to make a pot of cash for all this stuff! After chemo I m going to have a huge clear out! Had a look for a short wig to keep Cheryl company would like, a cut like my new one, really like this short hair thing, I can use Cheryl for nights out and the short one for popping out, as Cheryl is a bit long and hot to wear! Short maybe easier!  And scarves for at home as the wig is itchy already and only wore it for a matter of minutes!

This neutropenia thing is harder than I first anticipated, the sore mouth, ulcers gums arrangement is seriously mean, just as I get my appetite back you take away the ability to eat , thanks Lenny, you really are a royal pain! Now that’s Ironic Miss Alanis Morrissette!

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Neutropenic_sepsis

Diet http://www.livestrong.com/article/116654-neutropenic-diets/

So many limitations and that’s just one site, I’ve been doing my homework!

 Have been trying to think of things I can eat ,ice cream, angel delight, milkshake, requirements are to be part of the diet that you must follow the rules and not eat things that may upset your immune system,  but is limited when in hospital, need my own fridge freezer, can’t wait to get home to make my own food choices, the nurses are great here, can’t drink tea or coffee still so Milk is my saving grace at the moment , got a few great suggestions for soft food to fit in with the diet requirements Keith has filled our fridge and cupboards after visiting yesterday. Mum bought me an ice cream which was lovely! Really want a McDonalds milkshake, vanilla! Keith’s mum had those when she was neutropenic and now I see why!   hope I make it out of  here by Monday I need a few days at home before the next battle, got chemo Thursday need to be in tip top condition ready for the ‘hangover’ to start again! And to spend some time alone with my family.

Got my fighters name, but me and Jo aren’t sure how to pronounce it

Jo Scott 25 February at 15:14 Report

i think your fighter name should be Aceso Traceo :)
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Aceso

Aceso - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

en.wikipedia.org

Aceso (Ἀκεσώ) was the Greek goddess of the healing process. She was the daughter of Asclepius and Epione, sister of Iaso, Hygieia, Panacea, and Aegle.

Share

Jo Scott 25 February at 16:35 Report

hehehe!
only trouble is i'm not sure how to pronounce it. i was saying it like 'Ace-o Trace-o' but i think it might be pronounced more like 'ass-air-so' with 3 syllables.
could be TrAceso... (trace-air-so) :D

loved that Jo, made me laugh yesterday!

Anyway got my fighters hat on today need to get better to get back to my spingling girl as GG says! Need to get myself a dressing gown, like fighters one, with Team Lyddon Merryweather on the back! Lol, wish name wasn’t so long, going to expensive bet they charge by the letter! Bad luck, should be used to that!bad luck and disappointment been a bit of a them lately!

Need to get home to my bed too! And Ping, least he is off next week so if I feel better we can have a bit of fun before chemo, what to do! Just want to be with him and Lottie, maybe a day out if I m up to it everyone else will be at work, so thats why I was upset about not coming home for the weekend, wanted to spen the time with mum dad and Mandy, after chemo Iwill trapped at home again so can see a few of your smiling faces people! But only germ free visitors! Maybe I can invent a deep cleaner to walk through as you enter the Merryweather household! Like something out of a film!

 That’s my first million pound deal sorted, it’s like fools and horses, this time next year we’ll be millionaires Rodders!!  More millions to follow, we will be in Penthouse by next year Ping, you’ll see, we can turn it around, Lottie will have the best of everything and Mum and Dad and Mandy, treats on  me and my millions! Headscarf thing is my next idea, venture, some for young people! I don’t want to wear something for grannies!

don’t you know I m the incredible healing woman, mum says so, was home after a day after my c section when i had Lottie! Feel like getting dressed today but not sure the Doctor will approve he will think I m trying to escape after my tantrum yesterday! Yeah I had small paddy, few rants and bit of stomping around, gave  myself a good talking to and 31 minutes on the naughty step!

The strong,
The mighty. The forces of evil can never destroy,
The power of the wonder man,
And although the most formidable journey lies ahead,
Only one will pro-vale,
Wonder, Wonder, Wonder man. (Wonder man)

Uh yeah, these haters couldn't get to where I am with a full tank of petrol,

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HvFZJFf8S6Y

Good them tune, wonder woman though, haven’t had a sex change, been in hospital a while and will be bald soon but that’s a step too far!

I m over the tantrum now J got the fight to get back to, no time for tantrums, more fund raising business to get back to, had the afternoon off yesterday to make way for a tantrum, cross about that, and could have been getting organised for the hundred jobs I need to do before chemo ,Round 2 of the fight! Need to get this grant sorted hopefully for a laptop as cant borrow mums forever, as then I can’t speak to her over Skype etc , think is time for the lists, head is full of things to do! Must get them all written down! More books, more lists, this is like a full time job! Although I did prefer being a mum and my old job! Miss work, mad isn’t it,  the people element, was supposed to go to see them had it all planned, outfit, new hair to show them, I thought I can do this, show them it won’t beat me...then along came the N word L spoilt that too, never mind, will have to show off Cheryl instead!

Fantasy bashy, on the ipod,

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o3ymcjblGro&playnext=1&list=PL74AEBC39EC9B36D3

·          if its not positive I m not involved! Love that statement going to keep saying that one that one today!  Howard, reckon you would love that,” things only change if the mindset changes”, “one team ONE DREAM!!!” we need a few new ones, that’s your homework H!  Its 5.56, been ranting and goggling links for hours, need t get on now and get up and try think about what to eat... and wash my hair before it departs on its vacation, because it will be back! Like Arnold Schwarzenegger !

Cancer for dummies :-)

Treatment plan

How this things works! And I get rid of this squatter ! I never gave you permission to grow, so do one Lenny I m a bit too very  busy for cancer don’t ya know!

When I was in hospital I thought I could write a book, the control freaks guide to cancer, The tumournator, Cancer for dummies, the day after tumourmorow!

 maybe this blog will start it for me

Maybe I need a fighter name, to go with my boxing gloves from Fluff!!

 like Beyonce, Sasha Fierce! Maybe I ll have  Suggestions please! Running out of ideas, think I m burning my brain out!  

But I am learning to slow down, I m still 100 miles an hour, but this time I m more focused and feel like it’s a worthwhile thing to invest in. Things seem very clear!

I have a plan, everyone knows I like a plan, to be organised makes me happier, and it’s my way to deal with it all.

Treatment plan below:

Before chemo, blood test , Wednesday 2^nd, at the Lister to check blood levels before chemo next day

Thursday 3^rd March up to the UCLH for 2^nd round of chemo

http://www.uclhcharity.org.uk/

feel free to look over the site, donate, sign up for charity fundraising, totally brilliant there, really looked after me, a brilliant team and one of the reasons I want to help raise as much money as possible for them and Lymphoma and Cancer charities this summer.

http://www.lymphoma.org.uk/

above link to the Lymphoma charity, light a candle, organise a tea break sponsored at work , charity change boxes or wear it purple on Lymphoma awareness week  12-18 September, our anniversary week to, I ll be pushing this and would love some help its easy to do too! Buy a t shirt, or anything from the shop! T shirt for race for life, only £3!

We all know what we  are fighting , mine is aggressive, grows quick but reacts well and should go quick! Big isn’t bad like I first thought, as the beast was 18x10x8 cm! In my chest! No wonder couldn’t lay down or breathe!

http://www.macmillan.org.uk/Cancerinformation/Cancertypes/Lymphomanon-Hodgkin/TypesofNHL/DiffuselargeB-cell.aspx

had my bone marrow result yesterday..........ALL CLEAR, will be celebrating tonight with a glass of milk, or something as equally exciting, mouth is sore as have ulcers another side effect!

My cycle is a three week cycle, so chemo every three weeks, first one done giant tick!

Then they want me to 4 cycles, so 12 weeks then they will scan me to see what’s happened, it could be all gone, taking me to the summer to recover and maybe have some radiotherapy that’s the result I want not thinking about anything else, I ll deal with the first 12 weeks and get there first!

So back to next Thursday! Next chemo session at UCLH, 10.30 3^rd March

 First I ll see the consultant again first to see how I am then the chemo drugs, Keith coming with me

then start the chemo, on a drip, will be quicker this time, all 5 in one go

I m on R Chop

http://www.macmillan.org.uk/Cancerinformation/Cancertreatment/Treatmenttypes/Chemotherapy/Combinationregimen/R-CHOP.aspx

side effects below! Just a few! Will have a bad week but least I m an outpatient this time, will get to come home on the 3^rd March, and be ill for a week or so, until I get to where I am now the N word!

Side effects

v  Flu like symptoms, I had the flu anyway so who knows If I ll get this one next time!

v  Low blood pressure

v  Hot flushes

v  Low resistance to infection ( this is where I am now in the cycle)

v  Sickness ( like worst hangover u ever had x10)

v  No appetite , struggling to eat weird feeling too

v  Bruising, bleeding

v  HAIR LOSS, the big one, not there yet can take a bit longer, so far it’s still there!

v  Tiredness

v  Sore mouth ulcers( got them now, really painful) L

v  Hungry from steroids! (ironic when you can’t eat!)

v  Taste changes, for me it all tastes like poison, this gets better after week or so, so bit better now but last week water tasted terrible!

v  Numbness and tingling had that in my arms and legs and feet!

So after this terrible list and week of feeling like a bag of spanners, I ll feel bit better but will be waiting to go NEUTROPENIC!  

Need to look for the signs and call my nurse, she advises, and will result in a few days in hospital ( this is where I am in my cycle now!) very pleased I recognised the signs and got in will know what to look for next time

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Neutropenia

I ll have a few antibiotic IVs and be better and come home when my blood count returns to normal,

My result was 0.8  a count of 2.5-7.5 x 10⁹/L is a standard normal range

Once mine return I can go home and they need to be ready for the next round of chemo! Which is Thursday, and we start all over again!!! That’s the future for the Merryweathers for 12 weeks, now you all know as much as I do, the whole cycle/ treatment plan, hope I’ve answered all the questions, sorry haven’t been able to answer them but been a little bit busy with cancer and neutropenic sepsis, now I m feeling bit better I wanted to get this straight for myself ,family and friends, thank you again for all the messages/mails, texts ideas for fundraising, flowers, cards, presents, totally overwhelmed still, not sure I deserve any of it, the niceness that it, Not sure what happened to deserve the Lymphoma either but stick with him for now, until I can kick him out, he didn’t get permission and I don’t think he knows who he is messing with, I m too busy for all this illness , going to turn it all round for the best summer ever, when I have a good day I will be making the very most of it, Doctors orders!

Few jobs to do first, get a grant to buy laptop so I can stay in touch with everyone, Mum lent me hers so cant Skype her while I m, here, but I think I can fix that, fingers crossed, then  back to fundraising!

J