I got the Poison :I got the remedy!

Where to start..........

Last story before the big chop was from the hospital, so I ll go back to there, Keith came to visit Sunday morning, more blood tests antibiotic drip etc, same old routine, then wait for the Doctors ward round, he appeared and I thought, here comes more bad news.... but ....you neutrophils are up again, not as much as we hoped, but in the right direction , you obviously would be happier at home, with more sleep etc etc so you can go home with oral antibiotics and if you come back for blood test in the morning, but any sign of high temp etc then come back, YES, brilliant, of course, I ve done my homework I  replied! He laughed and said I can tell!

So we packed up all the stuff, and there was a lot to pack! Two trips to the car and off we went, home for supernoodles! Thanks again and Andrea, so soft and didn’t hurt at all, mouth is improving now though so back to nice healthily dinners apart from last night as we didn’t eat till 9 after the hair excitement !

So I came home, Lottie was at grandmas so said let her stay ther you go two Keith eat properly, both of you ,t hen bring her back and I will compose myself for when you return, I can see my Mum and sister that way too, was desperate to see them both.

When they arrived home she was so pleased to see me, just held her for ages, massive cuggles! ( Lottie can’t say cuddle!) we cuddled on the chair and waited for Tracy to come over, couldn’t wait to see her, We were planning to catch up at hospital, but this was better, she could come to my house! It  was great to see her, had a fun afternoon with Lottie , watching film in bed chatting and catching up on everything, Tracy is going to pretend that I m on a round the world trip when she is work! Loved that, I am on an adventure just a very different one, different to anything I ever thought I would cope with or do.

I asked Lottie if she loved me she said, No,  little madam! Love daddy? I asked,? No she replied!  nannie? Granga? NO she replied, I LOVE MANDY , I asked her why, mmmm maybe because I love my Mandy,. How sweet is that! Maybe she has been brainwashed in my absence! But she always has loved Mandy, she is very special after all . I must make an effort to become no.1 again lol

Mum Dad and Mandy came over Sunday night, just like normal kind of evening, was all laughing at Lottie she was being a real show off, excited we were all together again! They left and Keith put Lottie to bed, along came the sleeping marathon, should have got that sponsored for my charity stuff! 8pm till 5.30 am the next day , longest ever for me lately, Keith woke me at 10pm for my tablets, threw them down my thought, thought he was a nurse for a bit, and I was still in hospital, it was really odd feeling, but brilliant when I realised I was home.

Monday 28^th Feb

Loads to do, need a new wig, hair falling out, called Bex, need to the help and support, going to town to check out the shop Nat found out about for me! Thanks Nat

Went for blood test with Mum, had test not too much of a wait went to shop when waited for Keith, bought mum and Mandy a present hope they like them, only little but would buy them the world if I could after that the last two weeks, and a few other people too, too many to mention I would have to win the euro millions! Can’t believe how amazing people have been!

Saw Auntie in the shop next door, was amazing to see her, huge cuddles all round.

I put on my brave face and went in, so much in there, had a look around. We explained the situation and what we had in mind, She couldn’t have been more helpful, trying things on, what to use, how to clean it, etc etc, found the perfect one, same colour as mine almost exactly!

We laughed so much, is it right to be laughing when you are going completely bald? We just were so excited this shop was so close to us, and we didn’t know it was there!

AFRO ELEGANCE, HAIR AND BEAUTY STORE www.afroelegance.com 7 the Arcade Letchworth 01462 676140, its not open every day so check before you make a trip but well worth the trip, lots of hair pieces etc too to add to your hair, amazing, should have had some before now!

I will def be going back, maybe today to see if there are any others I want, there was a fab wavy one, reasonable prices too, could be like my new handbag addiction, a wig for every outfit ! lol Keith will be pleased! I ll get a new one for Lottie’s birthday party, need to get on send out invites, already spoke to some of you, its going to be amazing! Want to make it a birthday to remember for us all! So will need a new wig for that! Cheaper than a hair cut as my auntie pointed out! x

Names the new wig, Posh, all wigs going to be after celebs, so Posh can keep Cheryl company! 

Came home excited but could see may hair pouring out, thanks Bex for trying to cover it up but by the evening no one could hide that with a flowers/hairbands etc!

Went back to hospital for results, lots to tell, Lottie was amazing good girl, so proud of her. He was brilliant, neutrophil up to 1, would like it above 1.5 but we have till wed to get it up and its gone up every day, no temp, no illness, brilliant!

The xray result was there.... deep breath... Lenny had shrunk already! Wanted to scream and dance! I Haven’t seen Keith that happy for weeks! The best news ever, we didn’t think we would get any indication of that till after the chemo, couldn’t be happier, do one Lenny, your time is up! We don’t want/need you, never did, bye bye! Round one to me! Bring on the next chemo, all seems worth it now !

Also there is a drug I can take next time to boost my WBC (white blood count) and neutrophils so this may mean I don’t go neutropenic again and would avoid the hospital stay! They cant do it on your first cycle but can do it next time, it involves injection after chemo but they can come to my house and do that for me every day next week following chemo. More good news

Its called GCSF, it stimulates the bone marrow, and boost WBC and neutrophils, amazing, becoming a lymphoma guru! (loved that one Sally)

The Doctor used those magical words again, very treatable and responding well! Its reduced in size already!

Saw Lynne, who said I looked amazing, thanks sweetie, really needed to hear that, Hair was really worrying me x

Back to lister first thing Wed 2^nd March for blood test to see where we are before chemo Thursday!

Went to the car with a huge smile, had a text from Dan to say meeting had finished and to hurry up and  offered me tea! Blimey must have Cancer, he never makes a brew! Lol

So today is my day off! No bloods only tablets !  

Went to work, so amazing to see them all logged on like normal day! Laughed with Tracy and Keith, my work mum arrived for a cuddle and the girls, told Tracy no fuss, and she kept it normal for me, NO TEARS just happy smiles please, I m not dying, I just got a few things to fix and I ll be back!

Had a chat with everyone, Dan made me a drink, warm milk, hilarious really as I usually have black coffee ! Dan even made a few more drinks! Wow! Work drinks to wish the lovely Gillian good luck as she is leaving, hoping to make that one on the 10^th if I have my injections I may not go neutropenic! Keep your fingers crossed for me!

So thats work sorted will tick it off the list! Got a lift home with Tracy like old times, Lottie loves her car, beige beatle, love that car!  Went in to my baby girl, waved Tracy off! Lottie blowing kisses! How cute.

Hair was looking ropey, called Mand on Skype, needs to come off, we agreed, and honestly is one of my rules for this rollercoaster trip. She came over, Keith got out the clippers, felt sick, Decided to let Lottie watch, less of  shock, she can help, she laughing, we all were, Had to take the scissors to it first, see what it will be like when grows back int he summer, not bad, thought would hate it!

Number 8 first! You could see the baldness and patches! Number 6 next, hair everywhere, Good job Keith cuts his own hair! He nearly expert been doing it for more than ten years, he was brave to do mine though, Love him.  Went on till we cut it to 0.5! had a bath and mum arrived, she was great, no tears, we laughed a the relief my head wasn’t a funny shape!

Skped the family and friends, really laughing, put the wig on then pulled it for the big reveal! My fav reaction was cous Col, WOW! Looked like he went back a metre! He liked my head shape too! Aunite loved it too!  Cous Emma and K looked shocked but pleased! Rocking the bald look! Lol then Damian and Lisa, Das aid we could be the new Mitchell brothers, he has a 0.5 too! Bex and family loved it too! Felt good about it which surprised me ! Showed my Daddy, burst out laughing, we both did! Hilarious, should i be laughing! Keep saying that but I found it funny!

Put some pics on facebook, get shock value out of the way! Can’t wait to go out with my Carla today, first outing, need a serious dose of confidence boosting, I ll have to have wetabix! But seriously I got to do this, first outing, then it’ll get easier, wish me luck for today

Oh, my fab news, venue for charity event confirmed, lots more too, Toms fund raising at £400 today running half marathon for chemo unit, please support it, they save lives there, nothing more precious than that

http://www.justgiving.com/Thoams-Barnett

that’s my rather long blog, just one more link theme tune of today

I got the poison, I got the poison
I got the poison, I got the poison

I got the poison, I got the remedy
I got the pulsating rhythmical remedy
I got the poison, I got the remedy
I got the pulsating rhythmical remedy
I got the poison, I got the remedy
I got the pulsating rhythmical remedy
I got the poison, I got the remedy
I got the pressure, the pressure

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j1D2wnm5zPk

Have a good day everyone x